Thursday, September 3, 2009

Ouch

In the hopes of decreasing my bodily softiness that has come with turning 30 every year for the last 3 years I signed up with a trainer. I know this wasn’t part of my lay off recession spending plan but because I can go during lunch and pay cash I got a really good deal on 6 sessions to jump start myself. Plus I have been so miserly all year that I felt it was time to reward myself.  I went to my first session with the trainer and deduced he was trained by the Gulag Academy for Personal Trainers located in Uzbekistan.

The trainer put me on a machine that was basically a mechanical ladder (no, not the mechanical stepper - it's actually a 7 foot tall, 45 degree angle mechanized ladder). Yes, I am paying someone by the hour to watch me climb a ladder - I used to get paid $7 an hour to climb a ladder to paint houses after I got back from walking to school uphill in a blizzard both ways.

Anyway, I also went to my second Yoga class ever. The last one being when I was still in my springier 20s.

Yoga should stand for:

Yea that hurts
Ouch
Groan
Agh!

…which were most of the sounds coming out of my mouth during the 60 minute session.

Luckily there isn’t an “F” in the word Yoga.

I tried valiantly to go from down dog, to cow, cobra, crane and the rest of the zoological poses while trying to breath at the right times (or pant). Then finally to my favorite pose - the corpse pose - where you lie on your back and rest.  I didn't quite get to the relaxing, spiritual part of Yoga as it was hard to let my mind go when I could hear my joints popping and ligaments snapping.

It hurts to sneeze.

3 comments:

  1. Carm,
    It doesn't seem like many people are commenting on your blog, but don't give up. I like what you're writing. Our politics are different, but you make important points with clarity instead of insults; I like that. I'll keep reading.
    -Jessica Deckard

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  2. BTW, "Ms. Deckard" is because of my class blog. Check it out: nativesaints.blogspot.com

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  3. I yell the insults into my pillow at night. Just kidding. I usually see about 50-60 page views per entry which I find amusing. I try not to write anything without at least a cursory internet search to check stuff out first. Between the far right bent of fox news and the left view of everyone else, its kinda hard to find unbiased "who, what, when, where, why" info out there. Im moving soon which should keep me plenty busy with daily life observations versus rantings. Thanks for reading!

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